The Other McCain

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‘Aspiring Serial Killer’ Amy Brown (and Other Reasons to Avoid Online Dating)

Posted on | February 2, 2017 | Comments Off on ‘Aspiring Serial Killer’ Amy Brown (and Other Reasons to Avoid Online Dating)

You meet the worst people on Craigslist:

An “aspiring serial killer” allegedly stabbed her date in a motel and planned to eat his heart after killing him. The victim told police Amy Brown, 24, repeatedly asked him if he was a serial killer while the couple was in a motel room bed. When he said no, she allegedly climbed on top of him and replied, “Well, I’m a serial killer.” Brown and the man met up at the Rodeo Inn motel in Lynwood, Washington on January 30 after arranging their date on Craigslist, The Seattle Times reported. According to a police report, Brown planned to murder the man and eat his heart.
While being questioned, she also told authorities she had written a note to leave on the 29-year-old victim’s body after finishing the job, “explaining that she planned to kill again,” according to police. After revealing she was a “serial killer,” Brown reportedly began stabbing the man with a pocket knife. He managed to escape and call 911, and met police at a nearby Walgreen’s, before being taken to the hospital with a punctured lung. The victim said the attack was unprovoked and there had been no altercation beforehand. He told officers they met when she responded to his Craigslist ad, which was for “friendship and possibly dating,” rather than sex.
Police found Brown in the parking lot of the Rodeo Inn, where she had a knife. During police questioning, Brown was asked what happened, to which she replied, “I’m a loon.”

The report did not mention whether she had a feminist Tumblr blog, or whether she voted for Hillary Clinton, but I’m just going to go ahead and guess she’s a Democrat, because most crazy women are. But do we really need to talk about Sarah Silverman right now? Never mind. My point is, if a woman is using the Internet to find men to date, it means that no man who actually knows her in real life is interested in dating her.

There must be a reason she’s trolling Craigslist for dates, OK? How can you be sure she’s not a deranged Democrat psychopath who wants to stab you to death and then eat your heart? We know that stabbing men to death is every feminist’s secret fantasy, and ever since Hillary lost the election, some of them probably figure they’ve got nothing left to lose. That’s what must have happened to Amy Brown. Trump won the election, and she decided now’s the time to live the feminist dream.

Or that’s my theory, anyway, but if anyone doubts me, they can check the election results: Hillary got 54% of the vote in Washington State, and exit polls show she got 62% of the female vote, so doesn’t it seem likely that a 24-year-old woman in Snohomish County is a Democrat?

Also, because no man who actually knows Amy Brown in real life was interested in dating her . . . Well, obviously, she’s a feminist.

The world is full of crazy people nowadays. Be careful out there.

(Hat-tip: Kirby McCain on Twitter.)

 

Category: Crime, Washington State

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