The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

When @RooshV Is Right

Posted on | February 6, 2016 | 36 Comments

Currently 3,000 words into writing a very long article about the denouement of the drama about pickup artist (PUA) Daryush “Roosh V” Valizadeh, I need to take a break and give readers something to chew on in the meantime. As a father, a husband and a Christian, of course I must frown in disapproval at the entirety of PUA discourse. On the other hand, (a) I’m old enough to remember the “swinging singles” scene of the 1970s, and (b) I was a Democrat back then, so it’s not as if I don’t know how The Game is played. Or at least, how The Game used to be played. Exactly what it’s like for a young guy on the scene in the 21st century, I can’t say and, given the toxic aspects of contemporary “hookup culture,” my advice to any young man would be: If you can find a sane woman, marry her, and stay the heck away from the singles scene.

Whether viewed from either a practical or moral perspective, the prevailing insanity of young women’s attitudes and behavior in 2016 is a strong argument against pursuing the kind of hedonistic pleasures that pickup artists seek. It seems that the more a young woman goes through the “pump-and-dump” experience of a carousel rider — a hookup here, a “friends with benefits” arrangement there, cohabiting for a few months at a time with various boyfriends, etc. — the crazier she becomes. A girl who might have been potential wife material at 16 starts bouncing around from boyfriend to boyfriend and, by the time she’s 21 or 22, she has sustained so much emotional damage she is probably doomed to become a Crazy Cat Lady, gobbling antidepressant pills and updating her Tumblr blog between appointments with her therapist.

No father would want his daughter to become a carousel rider, nor would any mother want her son to date that kind of low-self-esteem trash, and yet PUAs are chasing after these “pump-and-dump” girls? Why? Oh, wait a minute — I’m having a flashback to the summer of 1978. However, I was a Democrat then and, also, I have the right to remain silent and to have my attorney present during questioning, Sheriff. But I digress . . .

Obviously, I do know why young guys go to nightclubs in search of easy action, but with the benefit of hindsight, I recognize this as a game for losers. If a guy is really a winner, he’s got a girlfriend, and if your girlfriend is a winner, well, why not get married, settle down and make babies with her? With two parents who are winners, your kids are almost guaranteed to be winners, and the world needs more winners, right?

There are way too many losers in the world already, which explains why these losers are all reading pickup artist stuff on the Internet, trying to figure out how to win. This is not to say, however, that what Roosh V says is always wrong. In fact, a lot of what he says about male/female dynamics is very insightful, despite his bad motives and the deliberately insulting language he uses toward women. And here is one of those cases where he makes an excellent suggestion:

A man at a bar will roll his eyes at feminist talking points, but he will nonetheless persist in his pursuit of the notch. This must end. . . .
Not only must you pass on a feminist, but you must let her know why you are passing on her. It must be clear to her that a man she was considering for sex has rejected her solely for her beliefs. Examples:

Girl: “It’s too bad that men still make more than women.”
You: “Wait, are you a feminist?”
Girl: “Well yeah.”
You: “Too bad, I don’t date feminists. Have a good night.”

Girl: “Birth control should be a human right, like mobile internet access.”
You: “So you’re a feminist?”
Girl: “I think if you believe in true equality, you’re a feminist, too.”
You: “LoL. I don’t talk to feminists.” Backturn

An argument or debate is not on the table. Do not give her the chance to explain her beliefs or demand to know yours. Once she admits to being a feminist, someone who believes in female superiority at the cost of male well-being, she no longer exists in your world.

This is exactly right, or almost so. Roosh V is correct that no man should ever let himself be drawn into an argument or debate with a feminist in a casual conversation. Seriously, guys: Once she identifies herself as a feminist, or exhibits the kind of hostile attitude that is typical of feminists, this is your cue to walk away, even if (a) she looks good, and (b) she’s otherwise giving you green-light signals. What you must realize is this: Feminists consider men their inferiors, and if a feminist signals sexual interest toward you, the question is, why?

Feminism attracts selfish, cruel and dishonest women by offering them a political rationale for their sadistic revenge fantasies. The only reason a feminist is ever interested in any man is because she craves the opportunity to humiliate him, thus to prove her own superiority to him. Jessica Valenti married Andrew Golis in 2009 and has been publicly humiliating him ever since, a shame that Golis (five years younger than his Vindictive Man-Hating Boss Lady wife) is required to endure in his assigned role as The Good Liberal Man, the Ice Queen’s sperm-donor/roommate/babysitter in their loveless sham of a marriage.

Only a masochist with zero self-respect could be interested in a relationship with such a heartless monster as Jessica Valenti, and this is what any pickup artist must consider if he encounters a woman who calls herself a “feminist.” Clearly, Roosh is correct that snubbing her — and making sure she knows why you’re snubbing her — is the smart play.

Do not argue or debate with her. Feminism is always a lecture, never a debate. Feminists have no respect for men. No feminist ever wants to hear anything a man has to say, so what’s the point of saying anything to a feminist except “good-bye”?

Heed my wisdom, young man: Nine times out of 10, the only reason a woman like that ever flirts with a man is to prove to herself that she could get him if she wanted him. Feminism is the political rationalization of neurotic women’s psychological deficits, you see. The feminist has self-esteem issues which she reverses into a grandiose narcissistic projection of herself as a Heroic Crusader for Social Justice. If you find yourself in a situation where such a woman is giving you green-light signals, therefore, this question is always why? And the answer is that she wants you to  make a move (thus validating her sense of herself as sexually desirable), so that she can have the sadistic pleasure of rejecting you, thereby demonstrating her superiority to you.

This is certainly not The Game a smart player would ever play, and so Roosh is right: Walk away. Of course, an unscrupulous cynic could probably think of alternative ways to play that scenario, but this would require (a) a genuinely wicked imagination and (b) master-level skills. Since I hung up the spurs when I married my wife in 1989, there are probably very few young riders in the carousel rodeo with the necessary combination of skills and attitude to execute the old Triple-Burn Play, and I’d be a fool to give away that kind of strategy, even if it eweren’t for my Christian moral objections to sinful fornication. Besides, if I waive my Miranda rights, anything I say can and will be used against me, and therefore I’ll invoke my right to remain silent, Sheriff.

The Game is a bad game, boys. “For the wages of sin is death,” and you can believe what you want to believe, but there is such a thing as justice in this world, and what goes around comes around sooner or later. Sinners usually learn that lesson the hard way, and a wise man would never play The Game rather than to risk becoming an Andrew Golis.

God must really hate that poor fool for some reason.

ADDENDUM: Let me add, while it’s on my mind, a further thought about PUAs. The median age at first marriage in 1959 (the year I was born) was about 20 for women, and 23 for men. It is now about 26 for women and 28 for men. What this trend represents is the decline of marriage, and if you haven’t studied this demographic trend as a historical phenomenon, you should. However, what the would-be pickup artist needs to think about when considering this trend is his exit strategy from The Game. By the time a guy is in his mid-20s, about half the women his age are already married. We may suppose that the woman who marries in her early 20s is more tradition-minded and also probably more attractive than the woman is still single at age 27 or 28. Remember what I said about carousel riders and emotional damage? How many times can a girl get burned in bad relationships before she’s psychologically broken beyond repair?

OK, so you are a college-age nerd who can’t succeed with the ladies, and you turn to the PUA community seeking to improve your chances. The key thing I wish to emphasize here is, don’t let The Game become your Afghanistan war. A young player — the guy who’s 21 or 22 and scoring regularly — may be tempted to believe he can keep playing The Game forever. If you pay attention, though, you’ll notice guys who stay in The Game too long, and it’s a sad sight to see a dude in his 30s hanging around bars trying to hit on girls 10 years younger than him. See, guys, there is ultimately no future in The Game, and the only way to win The Game is to quit The Game. And your chances of getting out of carousel rodeo, to exit The Game as a winner, are best if you find someone to marry before you get to the point that you’re picking through the culls and rejects that other guys didn’t consider keepers.

 

Category: Sex Trouble

Comments

36 Responses to “When @RooshV Is Right”

  1. CaptDMO
    February 6th, 2016 @ 5:38 pm

    Is there any reason to suspect that any of the target demographic for such advice, sorely in need of “The Talk* “, is part of “the usual suspects” of lurkers here?
    Granted, I know… word get’s around, people talk, and hyperlinks are seen on gas station bathroom walls, and all that…
    *,See: “Second Hand Lions”

  2. RS
    February 6th, 2016 @ 6:12 pm

    While Feminism is a set of beliefs–both exoteric and esoteric, as you’ve pointed out–it is also a lifestyle for its believers. Given that the political is personal, these women who self-identify as Feminists do not have an “off” switch. Thus everything, no matter how prosaic absolutely must be shoe-horned into the Feminist paradigm. Not only does such behavior bode ill for any long term relationship with a guy, but is counterproductive to setting up a short term fling. Simply put, nobody wants to listen to that crap for even as little as a couple of hours. It’s tedious in the extreme.

    Aside: I always wonder whether the constant repetition of feminist mantras by the elect is more convince themselves than anything else. As has been pointed out before, so much of Feminism is internally contradictory and self-refuting, it’s a wonder its practitioners’ heads don’t explode.

  3. Zhytamyr
    February 6th, 2016 @ 6:25 pm

    The case could be made that when you encounter any individual that exhibits hard left virtue signaling you should limit your interactions with them. They’ve let you know that they are somewhere between deluded lemming and murderous reptilian overlord.

  4. robertstacymccain
    February 6th, 2016 @ 6:29 pm

    “Given that the political is personal, these women who self-identify as Feminists do not have an ‘off’ switch.”

    This is a very important point. Because politics pervades every aspect of the feminist’s life — it is her identity — then nothing about her life is ever actually private. Everything is politics, and politics is everything, so that anyone who attempts to have a relationship with the feminist will discover that she has no humane or spiritual qualities.

    So many guys are superficial and cannot think of anything beyond “she’s cute.” A guy like that never imagines what fate awaits him when he falls for the Wrong Woman. One of the most important lessons any guy can learn is Beware of Pretty Poison. Alas, guys usually learn that lesson the hard way, and some of them never learn.

  5. John Farrier
    February 6th, 2016 @ 6:42 pm

    given the toxic aspects of contemporary “hookup culture,” my advice to any young man would be: If you can find a sane woman, marry her, and stay the heck away from the singles scene.

    This excellent advice jives with my own reading of dating now. Like you’ve said before: find a nice woman, then seal the deal.

    I’m just old enough to have dodged the nightmare of hookup culture.

  6. Steve Skubinna
    February 6th, 2016 @ 6:49 pm

    Nearly every subset of Progressivism is a rathole. Start down it and it shortly subsumes every aspect of your life and all you do all day long is virtue signalling.

  7. robertstacymccain
    February 6th, 2016 @ 8:12 pm

    The anecdotal evidence that comes to my attention suggests that young women are not as psychologically robust as the girls i knew in the 1970s and ’80s. A certain sort of confidence, rooted in an optimistic hope for the future goes a long way toward cushioning you against the heartaches and disappointments that necessarily attend Young Love. But, of course, back then we still believed in love and marriage as desirable goals, and even understood Right and Wrong, despite the fact we were generally doing what was Wrong. With the loss of a moral sensibility, we behold also a loss of confidence in the future, and this is where the existential rage of Feminist Tumblr comes from. Their lives suck, and they have no hope their lives will ever be any better, and so they want to destroy everything: SMASH PATRIARCHY!

    Well, the best way to avoid that swamp of despair is to be deliberately old-fashioned. Direct your sons toward a masculine rugged individualism, and teach your daughters a sense of dignity and self-respect. There will always be a demand for virtuous husbands and wives, and those parents who produce the supply should not worry that their work will be unrewarded.

  8. Daniel Freeman
    February 6th, 2016 @ 8:32 pm

    So I was going through Ashe Schow’s latest writings, as I do every now and then, and I was struck by this one: Students accused of sexual assault speak about their own trauma. Of course I could relate to it personally, but then I thought about Roosh.

    It’s one thing to be the subject of vile false rumors on a single college campus, and something else entirely to be the target of a deliberate global smear campaign by all the mainstream news media. If the former is traumatizing to the point of inducing emotional disorders and even suicidal ideation, how is Roosh holding up under the latter?

  9. Joe Joe
    February 6th, 2016 @ 8:48 pm

    “The Game is a bad game, boys. “For the wages of sin is death…” ”

    Exactly.

  10. DeadMessenger
    February 6th, 2016 @ 10:30 pm

    You know, on the one hand, Roosh had a smack-down coming anyway, the perv, but on the other hand, he had plenty of legitimately vile things to get smacked down for, without getting it on the basis of a falsified, BS premise. Where’s the lesson in that?

  11. DeadMessenger
    February 6th, 2016 @ 10:44 pm

    Part of the problem hinges on the parents of millenials who bought into the liberal child psychologist view that they needed to encourage self-esteem in their spoiled progeny, when a few moments of simple observation would have demonstrated to them that children have way too much self-esteem by nature. Rather, you have to put the child in his place and teach him respect for his elders, not make him king (or queen) of the hill. Letting your kid control you, rather than vice versa, is a fool’s errand.

    I was 16 when my youngest brother was born, so I was able to observe this in action, and notice that my parents brooked no nonsense from him, nor my other younger brothers. Then, when I took child psychology in college that same year, I thought the prof was joking around when he taught the “importance” of self-esteem, but was horrified when I came to realize that he wasn’t kidding at all. The incompetent fool. No wonder he was divorced and his kids lived with their mom.

  12. robertstacymccain
    February 7th, 2016 @ 12:48 am

    When the Left decide to destroy an enemy, they don’t care how they do it. Their brutality is part of the message: “Don’t cross us, or this will happen to you, too.”

  13. Fail Burton
    February 7th, 2016 @ 12:55 am

    This has nothing to do with Roosh per se. In the lesbian-centric supremacist feminism of blood libels we are seeing there is no due process for their target. In the theory of rape culture all men are beneficiaries as well as criminal accessories before and after the fact. There is no trial required; being a man is itself an indictment and guilty verdict. In other words Third Wave Feminism acts exactly like institutional white supremacy and anti-Semitism.

  14. robertstacymccain
    February 7th, 2016 @ 1:09 am

    “Letting your kid control you, rather than vice versa, is a fool’s errand.”

    Parents are a child’s first teacher, and ultimately, his most influential teachers. The spoiling of children — letting them tyrannize their parents — reflects erroneous ideas of “democracy” and “equality” that have been overwhelming our culture for decades. The parent who thinks of a child as an equal, deserving to have his demands met and his opinions and preferences indulged, is apt to raise a sociopath. The child must be directed in proper behavior, and must learn to restrain his own desires. The child must learn respect for hierarchy, which includes acceptance of his parents’ authority over him.

    It is not necessary for a parent to be a domineering bully to teach these lessons. An occasional reprimand for disobedience generally suffices, so long as the parent (in most cases the mother) is consistent in supervising and directing the child toward a habit of respect.

    The reason the “traditional” family arrangement works best is because, with a breadwinner husband, the mother can provide her children the consistent supervision necessary to raising good children. A child thrown into daycare at an early age will be more oriented toward conformity with his peers, and is more likely to develop a disrespectful attitude toward authority than the child raised by his own mother. And the father’s role in the traditional family is also crucial. He sometimes will be called upon to play “bad cop” — supporting the mother’s authority as “good cop” by meting out punishment — but he also gets to be the Team Captain, whose praise for a child’s good effort is a special reward.

    Mother and father united in a front of solidarity, agreeing on the values they wish to promote in their children, are a very powerful force in producing children who grow up with a strong sense of identity. If only we could get parents to understand how powerful they are (or can be) what a revolution they would make in the world!

  15. Feminism Is a Synonym for ‘Shut Up’ : The Other McCain
    February 7th, 2016 @ 2:35 am

    […] This quote from an anonymous young feminist’s Tumblr blog expresses the esoteric reality of feminism — what feminists really think, and say to each other privately — in contrast to the exoteric rhetoric feminists speak in public when trying to recruit new members and attract “mainstream” political support. In public, feminists claim to believe in equality between men and women; privately, feminists seethe with resentment toward men, dismiss men’s accomplishments as “male privilege,” denounce men as entirely useless and — as in the example above — express a wish to silence men. As I have previously explained: […]

  16. Finrod Felagund
    February 7th, 2016 @ 3:47 am

    Letting your kid control you is how you end up raising an Eric Cartman.

  17. Adam
    February 7th, 2016 @ 5:42 am

    “… A young player — the guy who’s 21 or 22 and scoring regularly — may be tempted to believe he can keep playing The Game forever …”

    Actually on this you are plain wrong. A woman’s sexual market value, (known as SMV) peaks at around 25 and is on a downward slope from that point on. A man’s SMV peaks way into his thirties, (the two lines cross at around the age of 29).

    If as a man you get nailed down early you will have underperformed in a general sense. Now I’m sure that there will be many people here who will come up with personal anecdotes of meeting their perfect life partner at the age of 22 and that is fine, but it does not disprove the general theory.

    Here’s an article on the subject from rollo:

    http://therationalmale.com/2012/06/04/final-exam-navigating-the-smp/

  18. Daniel Freeman
    February 7th, 2016 @ 6:24 am

    To answer my own question, he is holding up remarkably well.

  19. RS
    February 7th, 2016 @ 8:20 am

    Comment to the Addendum:

    What this trend represents is the decline of marriage, and if you haven’t studied this demographic trend as a historical phenomenon, you should.

    If I may quibble, a delay in acting does not necessarily mean that the action is foregone. In the case of marriage, delay may be due to a number of factors including the increase in women seeking post secondary education, economic instability and decline of blue collar manufacturing jobs for males, delay in maturation among younger generations and misbegotten Progressive disincentives to marriage. (Marriage is holding steady among the upper classes but continues to decline among the lower socio-economic strata.)

    The delay in marriage certainly could lead to fewer children of two parent households, but not necessarily fewer marriages.

  20. tz1
    February 7th, 2016 @ 8:56 am

    Of course no one mentions the STD pandemic – The carousel riders tend to collect infections, some incurable, often become sterile. The CDC is worried about Zika, but XDR gonorhea or syphllis isn’t advertised.

  21. Quartermaster
    February 7th, 2016 @ 11:49 am

    “…but there is such a thing as justice in this world, and what goes around comes around sooner or later.”

    Yeppers! God is a God of holiness and justice. His justice, however, will be harsh by our standards, but completely just.

    “Knowing, therefore, the terror of the Lord, we persuade men;….”
    2Co 5:11

  22. retrophoebia
    February 7th, 2016 @ 11:49 am

    “It’s a sad sight…”

    Sure. Now, after telling me that women older than 22 are emotionally damaged beyond repair, and that most women are marrying around 26 or 28, tell me where the marriageable women who are interested in marriage are. Certainly not in the 30s, and they have zero interest in marrying at 22 when they’re still having fun. It’s not guys that are delaying marriage.

    It’s true, you don’t know what it’s like out there now.

  23. Quartermaster
    February 7th, 2016 @ 11:50 am

    Satan loves for people to pursue their own lusts. If people were fully informed as to the results, then Satan would not be able to sit back and laugh at the stupidity of those following his path. His human minions also don’t want to hear about the dangers.

  24. Quartermaster
    February 7th, 2016 @ 11:53 am

    My son, soon to be 38, completed an MSEE in 2010 and has not been able to find a girl worth taking the jump with. Feminism is a poison that has been spread far and wide and finding a girl that hasn’t been affected by it is quite difficult.

  25. Ilion
    February 7th, 2016 @ 12:14 pm

    It’s true that even most of the women who insist, “I’m not a feminist!” have been poisoned by it, and try to live their lives by its premises … which means that they accept those premises as valid … which means that they really are feminists, they just won’t admit it to themselves. BUT, so have the men.
    .
    Now, of course, I don’t know your son, so I would never even suggest that this is a part of his problem. However, on average, a big part of the reason that modern young men can’t find “suitable” women to make wives is because they have it in their minds that they “deserve” a “10” — they’re not looking for a woman to adorn their lives; they’re looking for a woman to adorn their arms.

  26. retrophoebia
    February 7th, 2016 @ 12:17 pm

    And in addition to feminist leanings, which I think we agree are toxic and essentially disqualifying but massively prevalent through younger female culture, let’s not forget obesity and school debt as deleterious factors in the hunt for suitable women. But the guys without wives are losers, right?

    Yeah, the whole thing pisses me off. And Roosh too- which is why you see stuff like this: http://www.rooshv.com/men-are-nothing-more-than-clowns-to-the-modern-woman

  27. Quartermaster
    February 7th, 2016 @ 3:30 pm

    He’s not looking for arm candy. He does want a pretty woman, but pretty does not equal “10.” He is well aware that woman can be pretty, but ugly as original sin. he also knows that a woman can be a beauty and not be all that pretty.

    He may have found a girl recently. he met her at a tailgate party before a KC Royals Game, and she now goes to the same church and joined the same small group. He seems taken by her as well. This will be #3 since he got out of grad school, so we will see what happens.

    There are other factors involved that I can’t go into here that are part of why he dumped #2. Feminism was a large part of it, however.

  28. me
    February 7th, 2016 @ 9:21 pm

    You actually agree with Roosh more than you realize. Seriously, read more of his writings, especially the more recent ones. You’ll find that you two are on the same page.

    Also, most of the so-called “insulting language” on Roosh’s part is deliberate baiting of the enemy. A pretty effective way to get free advertisement from the SJW degenerate mafia – and those idiots are too stupid to even realize they’re helping him!

  29. Ilion
    February 7th, 2016 @ 10:01 pm

    I wish him Godspeed on “closing the deal” … and a long and happy and fruitful marriage.

  30. Davis M.J. Aurini
    February 7th, 2016 @ 11:08 pm

    Good advice; though I would mention that a great deal of the weight of sin has to do with the intention behind it. A gourmand who eats too much because of his love of food is different from a degenerate who eats fast-food every day out of self-loathing.

    Sometimes children need to eat all the candy at Halloween to realize that it’s no good for them.

    That said, I think you took an excellent, even-handed tone here – and that’s coming from one sinner to another. 😉

  31. Davis M.J. Aurini
    February 7th, 2016 @ 11:12 pm

    Roosh is being attacked for the virtues he holds, not for his vices.

  32. DeadMessenger
    February 8th, 2016 @ 4:01 am

    Exactly, so when he actually does display a virtue, we ought to pat him on the back, not throw him under the bus. Positive reinforcement and all.

  33. take note boys | Kevin Burctoolla's gaming world
    February 8th, 2016 @ 11:14 am

    […] read more why Rooshv is right here. […]

  34. Road trip proverbs [Pr 30] | Dark Brightness
    February 8th, 2016 @ 2:17 pm

    […] Feminism is always a lecture, never a debate. Feminists have no respect for men. No feminist ever wants to hear anything a man has to say, so what’s the point of saying anything to a feminist except “good-bye”? […]

  35. MC227
    February 8th, 2016 @ 2:35 pm

    How many times can a girl get burned in a bad relationship? Usually the woman is the one who makes the relationship bad to begin with. With everything young people are hit with including the media, movies, commercials, TV shows, public school it’s a wonder most young women are not total tramps. It’s their choice.

  36. When @RooshV Is Right | Living in Anglo-America
    February 8th, 2016 @ 3:29 pm

    […] When @RooshV Is Right […]