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‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity

Posted on | August 7, 2013 | 29 Comments

Charles Carreon on Bloomberg News, March 2012.

Ken White at Popehat continues his reign of terror by offering to debate censorious douchebag Charles Carreon over the latter’s proposal that “Distributed Internet Reputational Attack” be recognized as a tort (i.e., grounds for a civil lawsuit).

Mr. Carreon’s problem is simple: He doesn’t understand how the Internet works. Also, he is a censorious douchebag.

Some writers on the Internet are more popular than others, which is perhaps not the same as saying that the more popular writers are always better writers than the less popular writers, but the saying that “content is king” expresses a basic truth: Someone who consistently cranks out good stuff will usually have more success online, especially if they have a strong sense of what readers want to read.

Ken White has built a large and loyal readership, especially among aficionados of legal lore and First Amendment issues. In addition to his vast legal erudition, he brings to his blog a capacity for diligent research and a lively sense of humor. Among the readers of Popehat are other successful bloggers with a legal background, including the very popular Instapundit. Ken White is, we might say, a blogger’s blogger, and this means that if he sets his sights on a vulnerable target, several other bloggers are likely to join the bombardment.

Charles Carreon evidently does not understand this and therefore, when Popehat helped turn Oatmeal’s hilarious beatdown of Carreon into a viral sensation last year, Carreon perceived this as an injustice which he now proposes to make a tort, “Distributed Internet Reputational Attack.” But who is to blame for this?

CHARLES CARREON IS TO BLAME.

Attempting to evade responsibility for one’s own errors by externalizing blame onto scapegoats is at the heart of Carreon’s problems. To describe the auto-douchebaggification process briefly:

  1. Idiot says, writes, or does something stupid.
  2. The stupidity appears on the Internet.
  3. Bloggers notice the stupidity, make fun of the idiot.
  4. “Hilarity ensues,” as they say. People in comments of blogs pile on further insults, blog readers look up the idiot’s phone number or e-mail address and express in vivid terms their disdain for the idiot’s stupidity.
  5. Idiot reacts stupidly, further hilarity ensues.

Charles Carreon’s reaction to his initial Oatmeal-v-FunnyJunk embarrassment was to double down and double down again. He ignored the First Law of Holes and kept digging, because it evidently never entered his mind that perhaps he was in the wrong.

Thin-skinned narcissists who cannot admit error — whose response to criticism is always to demonize their critics, and who therefore automatically externalize blame for their own mistakes — are always doing this sort of thing to themselves in the Internet age.

Look: If you are ever in a situation where your stupidity makes you a target, the correct thing to do is . . . nothing.

Don’t react. Don’t try to defend yourself. Don’t lash out at your tormenters. Just ignore it until it is over. Learn your lesson, avoid repetition of the error, and be glad it wasn’t worse.

People who merely describe your stupidity — however mocking and sarcastic their descriptions — have done you no wrong.

Consider the example of Jackie Mackie Paisley Passey, who described herself as “a very high-quality woman,” citing the reasons why men should crave her romantic companionship:

I’m sorry if I’ve offended you, but I’m also really sick of getting e-mailed several times a week by delusionally hopeful men who read my blog and think because I am *their* dream girl that I’ll therefore want them too.

Ace of Spades disassembled her with astonishing deftness:

Look, I want to make it clear I’m not saying this girl is ugly, per se. What she is is “plain.” She is what I call “Bad Irish.” The Irish look, but not the Good Irish look. The pasty skin, the elfin features… but not cute elfin, or better yet, hot elfin.
What you’re looking at here is a 5. A girl you wouldn’t notice in the average college or singles bar, except maybe if you had recently quit smoking, and noticed she had a fresh pack of Marlboro Reds held in her (indifferent) cleavage.

And you know something? However humiliated she was by that — and trust me, she deserved the humiliation — Ms. Passey figured out rather quickly that there was no way to “win” it. After an update or two where she tried to explain, defend or justify her stupidity, she walked away and eventually married a guy (“delusionally hopeful”?) and disappeared from the blogosphere.

Is Charles Carreon as smart as Jackie Mackie Paisley Passey?

Stay tuned to Popehat for further developments.

 

Category: How This Here Internet Thingy Works

Comments

29 Responses to “‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity”

  1. Richard McEnroe
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:56 pm

    Anyone who pushes DIRA is a Perpetually Un-Satisfied Selfish Yobbo (or PUSSY, in bar terms)…

  2. rsmccain
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:56 pm

    ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity http://t.co/Nm2Pi99TyJ | H/Ts @Popehat @AceofSpadesHQ

  3. Richard McEnroe
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:57 pm

    He used to have a much more distinguished nose before ambulances had to slow down for intersections.

  4. CHideout
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:00 pm

    ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity: Charles Carreon on Bloom… http://t.co/XvBY2twSar

  5. MrEvilMatt
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:00 pm

    ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity: Charles Carreon on Bloom… http://t.co/wE1p25BUUU

  6. jwbrown1969
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:00 pm

    ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity: Charles Carreon on Bloom… http://t.co/BdDaJdXU5s

  7. Lockestep1776
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:00 pm

    ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity: Charles Carreon on Bloom… http://t.co/q2RiC2iZtk

  8. Citzcom
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:00 pm

    ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity: Charles Carreon on Bloom… http://t.co/MojAvjC2cd

  9. preciseBlogs
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:04 pm

    ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’ Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity http://t.co/QFWD4BuvBv #news #conservative

  10. rsmccain
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:04 pm

    RT @commonpatriot: via @rsmccain: ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity http://t.co/MlMhDWAl…

  11. BobBelvedere
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:10 pm

    RT @commonpatriot: via @rsmccain: ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity http://t.co/MlMhDWAl…

  12. rsmccain
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:13 pm

    RT @MrEvilMatt: ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity: Charles Carreon on Bloom… http://t.…

  13. Dianna Deeley
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:15 pm

    Oh, that’s going to leave a mark!

  14. rsmccain
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:30 pm

    “Is Charles Carreon as smart as Jackie Mackie Paisley Passey?” http://t.co/Nm2Pi99TyJ | @AceofSpadesHQ @Popehat @instapundit

  15. BobBelvedere
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:45 pm

    RT @rsmccain: “Is Charles Carreon as smart as Jackie Mackie Paisley Passey?” http://t.co/C90zHe3plZ | No, but he sure has a pretty mouth.

  16. SPQR9
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:48 pm

    Carreon is just scum. Censorious? Sure. Incompetent? Yep. Flaming moron? That too.

    But basically, scum. He’s all butthurt that his attempt at intimidation backfired on him. As it should have.

  17. rsmccain
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:55 pm

    RT @BobBelvedere: RT @rsmccain: “Is Charles Carreon as smart as Jackie Mackie Paisley Passey?” http://t.co/C90zHe3plZ | No, but he sure has…

  18. Kerry Dar-Du
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:57 pm

    Kerry Dar-Du liked this on Facebook.

  19. Professor_Why
    August 7th, 2013 @ 9:04 pm

    ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity http://t.co/NXKH363VF8

  20. AmPowerBlog
    August 7th, 2013 @ 9:09 pm

    RT @BobBelvedere: RT @rsmccain: “Is Charles Carreon as smart as Jackie Mackie Paisley Passey?” http://t.co/C90zHe3plZ | No, but he sure has…

  21. Charles Carreon And The Streisand Effect | That Mr. G Guy's Blog
    August 7th, 2013 @ 9:18 pm

    […] Stacy McCain points out a basic truth of the internet…if you do something stupid that brings satire and insults, the best thing to do is to lie low until people forget about whatever it was you did to cause your discomfort and ridicule. […]

  22. joethefatman1
    August 7th, 2013 @ 9:34 pm

    ‘Distributed Internet Reputational Attack’? Charles Carreon’s Self-Evident Absurdity http://t.co/Tz2a2jNHj0

  23. Hanzo
    August 7th, 2013 @ 9:59 pm

    Well, when you’re a double double downer it’s not going to end well. He must have a huge shovel.

  24. DaveO
    August 7th, 2013 @ 10:07 pm

    There’s a 3rd Law of Holes. “If a lawyer proposes something is a tort to a judge and there’s lots of money to be made, then the judge, being a lawyer, will agree that that something is a tort.”

  25. Finrod Felagund
    August 8th, 2013 @ 12:03 am

    Old Klingon proverb: you cannot tarnish a rusty blade.

  26. jakee308
    August 8th, 2013 @ 3:55 am

    Whenever I screw up on the innertubes by saying something stupid, I just run and hide.

    I never read the responses (unless I’m not aware how badly I screwed up and accidentally look) and take a 1-2 day rest to give everyone a chance to forget. Or have their squirrel like attention get redirected.

    Sure it’s archived but it’s not like I do it on my own blog.

    (Which is why I don’t have one).

  27. Stogie Chomper
    August 8th, 2013 @ 11:46 am

    He should have called it “Distributed Internet Reputational Tactic,” or DIRT. That would be much more humorous. What a guy. No wonder his last name sounds like a rotting corpse.

  28. Stogie Chomper
    August 8th, 2013 @ 11:47 am

    Or how about this: “Nothing to see here: Carreon.”

  29. richard mcenroe
    August 9th, 2013 @ 9:32 am

    Does he work for the Democratic Party?