The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

SCOTUS Chief Justice-At-Large Paul Anka Rejected ObamaCare For Lack Of Integrity

Posted on | July 1, 2012 | 3 Comments

by Smitty

[There has been a lot of curiosity about the behind-the-scenes maneuvering that triggered the SCOTUS to shift the ObamaCare penalty to a tax. This blog has recovered a secret transcript of the deliberations with SCOTUS Chief Justice-at-Large Paul Anka, as he led the Supreme Court to enlightenment.]

Anka: “First order of business: no penalties masquerading as taxes. Understand that? You see these taxes that everybody’s paying? Everybody pu–where’s the…where’s the gal on the end? The former White House Counsel.”

Roberts: “You weren’t calling it a tax.”

Kagan: “I know.”

Anka: “The other gal on the end there, the taxer! Taxer! Didn’t I say taxes?”

Roberts: “Yeah. I thought he was covered.”

Anka: “You thought, you thought. You thought. . .you thought eight things tonight. You’re on friggin’ notice, John. OK?

  • The people get taxes. Don’t make a friggin’ maniac out of me.
  • The people get taxes. Do you understand? We not gonna be ‘as strong as our weakest link’.
  • The people get taxes. (You understand that?) This is like football, baseball, like anything else.
  • The people get taxes. That’s just the friggin’ way it is. What’s it gonna be, guys? Who are you watching?

(What’s your problem?)

I don’t get it. I don’t get it. Do you understand that? You want your jobs? Where’s Joe? There is a lot of loose stuff going on, and I am telling you, you guys are on thin ice. All right? I am telling you right now. And when I friggin’ move, I slice like a friggin’ hammer. You’ve seen it, and I’ll do it again. You understand that? That’s just the friggin’ way it is.

Every one of your friggin’ checks cash with the amount on it. Do any of your checks bounce? Do you all get full value on your money? I want full value on your friggin’ service. Do you hear me? Do you understand that? That’s just the way it is around here.

I’m warning you. I’m the only important one on that stage. You understand that? You want to lose a job? Do you? Then put me some friggin’ knowledge in here.

Tell me what’s wrong. He’s the only one with his hands up, and he cuts off. Now give me some intelligent friggin’ answers. Who are you watchin’?

Where’s Joe? I don’t get it. I don’t get it. You understand that? I am telling you that this job is on thin ice. And you know how fast I move. I don’t care if you’re a white man, a production manager, an agent or a theater owner like last night. Do you understand?

I have a new philosophy. I don’t care if it’s Jesus Christ. I’m the only important one on that stage. I’m warning you. Is that good enough? For all of you? I’m on that kind of an integrity kick. Do you understand? Do you understand where I’m coming from with integrity? If you guys had better understand the same thing. Because you’re all replaceable.

Do you like your jobs? Do you want your jobs? Do you? Then you’d better protect hers. That’s just the friggin’ way it is. Get it friggin’ right. That’s just the way it is around here. Do you hear me? Do you understand that? Don’t make a friggin’ maniac out of me.

NSFW reference

Category: Farce, humor, Supreme Court

Comments

3 Responses to “SCOTUS Chief Justice-At-Large Paul Anka Rejected ObamaCare For Lack Of Integrity”

  1. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    July 1st, 2012 @ 7:24 pm

    Paul Anka wrote “My Way” and that Obamacare Roberts opinion is definitely not consistent with that song.  Da Tech Guy is calling him  Ol Yellowstain.  

  2. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    July 1st, 2012 @ 7:31 pm

    Professor Jacobson has a post ” Alone again, naturally” which is the title to that Gillbert O’Sullivan song from the seventies.  

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