Guess Who Kills Terrorists?
Posted on | May 24, 2012 | 45 Comments
The United States Army Special Forces, that’s who!
My 19-year-old son Bob called me yesterday here in the Undisclosed Location to tell me that he had scored 98 on his Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery (ASVAB). The recruiter told my son this high score qualifies him for any career field in the Army, and Bob told the recruiter that he wants to try for Special Forces.
Needless to say, Mrs. Other McCain is worried about Bob’s military aspirations, even though this is a fine family tradition. One of her brothers served in the Marines and another of her brothers is an Army reservist who was deployed to Iraq. My brother served in the 101st Airborne and my father got a purple heart while fighting the Nazis in World War II. But moms worry about their boys, and so my wife is worried about Bob’s career goal of joining the U.S. Army Special Forces.
Even though she’s worried about our son, of course, she’s still very proud of him. Bob’s not worried at all, having evidently inherited his devil-may-care attitude from me, whereas we give Mrs. Other McCain most of the credit for Bob’s extraordinary good looks.
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45 Responses to “Guess Who Kills Terrorists?”
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May 24th, 2012 @ 9:40 am
That’s an excellent score! We need good people in the military, so best of luck to your boys!
May 24th, 2012 @ 9:44 am
They don’t take SF straight out of AIT at Benning. Your boy will have to put in his time at Airborne school, probably Ranger school, and stay in long enough to get his sergeant’s stripes; unless they’ve changed there’s no such thing as “enlisted” SF, only noncoms.
If he winds up with the ‘Tower of Power” on his uniform (Airborne wings, Ranger tabs and SF) the kid will have really done something.
Oh, and if he goes Airborne tell him not to let them catch him singing “Gravy on the Poodle.”
May 24th, 2012 @ 9:45 am
Anyway, the point is, it’ll be a few years before they drop him anywhere people eat snakes and dogs normally.
May 24th, 2012 @ 10:03 am
Good luck to him. I understand your wife’s worry, but I would be as pleased as punch if any (purely hypothetical) son of mine signed up, especially for something as tough as that.
May 24th, 2012 @ 10:04 am
Well, yeah, of course it would take years for Bob to become a snake-eater. But the point is, that’s his goal — to become a Certifiied BAMF — because … well, chicks dig it.
May 24th, 2012 @ 10:15 am
Chat with Skip@Grok sometime, he’s got two boys in the armed forces.
also, please drop Skip a line: I thi it’s time we recorded and interview on the Kimberlin situation.
May 24th, 2012 @ 10:21 am
Is that 98 percentile?
I got a 99 in GRE and GMAT . Topping tests doesn’t really give you the big picture.
May 24th, 2012 @ 10:21 am
I would imagine your wife is also a wee bit concerned by having to flee your home.
May 24th, 2012 @ 10:22 am
But congratulations to your son and to your family. Well done (he should also consider the Marine Corps).
May 24th, 2012 @ 10:40 am
Yeah, ain’t that the truth!
May 24th, 2012 @ 10:40 am
Depending upon his MOS and job performance (mostly the latter), it shouldn’t take an excessively long time…the hubby and the sil both got selection bids for SF after three years.
But with a 98…he should be making the recruiter do the Jerry Maguire.
May 24th, 2012 @ 10:48 am
An admirable goal, to be sure. SFAS is a killer, and it has a monstrous attrition rate. You have figured out that a young man cannot enlist for SF, but there’s nothing stopping him from gaining the privilege of trying out for SF later on, when he’s not so green behind the ears. Advise him to build his military experience towards that inevitable chance. I would recommend 11X or some other Combat Arms MOS as a springboard. (But I’m sure he is aware of that already.)
Best wishes to him!
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:01 am
As Jeff Dunham’s Peanut would say, “Nyyyowww!” Right over her head.
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:03 am
Also, in jump school, do NOT yell “Freebird!” as you clear the door…
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:04 am
Can’t. He reads.
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:05 am
@rsmccain Higher than my score, in fact. So high, we should really have him talk to the Navy nuclear recruiter.
Also, if he’s willing to do time at Sing Sing on the Severn, he could use my Secret Route for getting USNA admission.
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:10 am
That means 98 percent of the people who took the ASVAB scored lower than him.
It means whatever branch would be pretty happy to get somebody with that score, and all MOS are open to him — which means Uncle Sam needs to woo that, and woo it well.
Be sure to remind Mr. recruiter of that.
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:12 am
Make sure he understands it’s not the same chicks who watch C-SPAN.
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:19 am
Easy there chief.
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:20 am
Make sure he knows about the camo bunnies too — they are a tricky species you mens do not want to get entangled with (and always seem to).
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:26 am
You really should be nice and talk about the damage control training if you’re going to go turning the nuke recruiter loose on that boy…
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:30 am
smitty, my son just did his junior year candidate visit last sept. at Canoe U. and is impatiently waiting to continue the admission process. It’s going to be a long senior year….for everyone.
I know he’s never hear of “Sing Sing on the Severn”. He’ll get a kick out of that.
Go Navy!
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:35 am
So no White House tours, huh?
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:43 am
Fifteen seconds of research would have told you that ASVAB scores are percentiles, Super Genius.
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:49 am
Be sure to watch the documentary “Two Weeks in Hell” to get a glimpse of what SFAS (SF Assessment and Selection) is like.
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:55 am
Hey, don’t be a hater — scoring 99 on the GRE and GMAT does not a Super Genius make after all.
Let’s be kind…don’t judge.
May 24th, 2012 @ 11:59 am
No hate intended. (NOH8!)
I intended merely the same kind of gentle mocking one makes at, say, a grammar Nazi whose multi-paragraph rant uses “your” instead of “you’re”.
May 24th, 2012 @ 12:09 pm
Jealously is never attractive.
May 24th, 2012 @ 12:10 pm
I’m sure it was just a test to see if everyone’s ability to pick up on the grammatical error was in fighting form.
May 24th, 2012 @ 12:16 pm
Actually, scoring a 99 didn’t make me an average success either in academics or in my chosen field.
That was what I was refering to in my initial comment.
I changed fields, totally unrelated to my academics and career desires as a young graduate.
May 24th, 2012 @ 1:11 pm
Who knew PW and Evi were nags?
Now why do you be good little girls and get Richard and I a drink – and don’t put in too much ice.
May 24th, 2012 @ 1:15 pm
I’m sure he’ll do our country (and his family) proud. I’m also sure we can’t have too many with his background in our armed forces.
May 24th, 2012 @ 2:08 pm
Tut tut, Anamika, tut tut!
Indeed, that is a 98 percentile!
But one must remember that the GRE/GMAT measure the potential success of a person as a graduate student. Hence, the base reference are all potential graduate students (ages 18 and up), and the capabilities being measured are verbal reasoning, quantitative reasoning, and analytical writing.
Then, one must understand that the AVSAB is focused on national sample of youth aged 18 to 23, and is “…designed to predict success in the military” in four domains: Verbal, Math, Science and Technical, and Spatial.
Hence, the comparison of his score to yours is utterly irrelevant to the conversation,. And demonstrates that any higher education was clearly wasted on you, especially when it comes to verbal reasoning, quantitative reasoning, and analytical writing.
Tut tut, Anamika! Please remember that Bing is your friend. Tut tut!
May 24th, 2012 @ 2:37 pm
We’ve always thought of you as in the 99th infantile.
May 24th, 2012 @ 2:38 pm
That’s okay. Mouthy hookers serve a societal need, too.
May 24th, 2012 @ 4:07 pm
I believe in self reliance, go get make one yourself.
oooh, oh, I’m sorry; I forgot: doggies don’t know how to take initiative and spearhead a project — could be unsafe. Ok then, I’ll make sure the kitchen is all clear and signal to you when it’s safe to come in.
😛
who loves ya babies 😉
May 24th, 2012 @ 4:09 pm
Dang, you’re just on a roll lately.
May 24th, 2012 @ 6:25 pm
When son decided to enlist, we did some talking, and one of the things I advised was “Start working out NOW.” So if he hasn’t yet, tell him to begin.
May 24th, 2012 @ 6:30 pm
A friend was a Marine early in the Vietnam war, and outside the ossifers, he was the only one in the company that could read. He was named Company clerk as a result. Fortunately, that is not the case anymore.
May 24th, 2012 @ 6:34 pm
I scored 99 on mine. I had enough sense to apply for Army Flight School instead of the Penitentiary on the Severn.
May 24th, 2012 @ 7:30 pm
My dad and all of my uncles were Marines…all of them could read…even books without the pictures in them and everything.
But admittedly my dad only scored 141 on an iq test, so yes, desperate imbeciles here; no sooper duper geniuses.
May 24th, 2012 @ 10:38 pm
I’d suggest he look up the new PT test and standards at armytimes.com and start training to those.
May 24th, 2012 @ 10:40 pm
Charlie ain’t half as dangerous as Charlene, soldier!
May 25th, 2012 @ 9:54 pm
SF recently has returned to their original mission, nation building. In AFPAK they had gotten into tier one SOF role, which is not their charter.
May 25th, 2012 @ 9:58 pm
There are homeschoolers in the Army, including in Officer Corps. Also, vegetarians.